Dear Naima, 4mo
10:00 p.m. on August 24, 2006
Dear Naima,
my precious baby girl, today you are 4mo old. you're such a big girl already. you're still confusing everyone with your size making them think you're 6mo instead of just 4. i wish you could stay my itty bitty baby forever...
i had to leave work half a day today to take you to the pediatrician again. you got your 4mo immunizations yesterday and today you got the fever. and here i thought you handled this month's shots beautifully. i cried more than you did at the doctor's office and today we both cried just as much.
it's so very difficult to hear you cry. i can't keep my tears in when i hear you cry. it's so very painful. especially when you get to that high pitched scream. that can literally send shocks down my spine. i don't know how to explain it but it's more than a mother feeling her child's pain. when i hear you cry i'm reminded of Mia. i think those are the cries Mia never got to let out. those are the tears Mia never got to let fall. and if i could have, i would have held Mia in my arms and rocked her to sleep and soothed her pain away just as i do with you. so yes it's extremely difficult to hear you scream. because for every cry you let out, for every pain you express, for every smile you give, for every laugh you share, for every joy you enjoy i hear two...you AND your big sister Mia.
you're doing a lot better now. though you did have a bit of a fever going the ped was kind enough to take us to see you once again. she's such an understanding doctor...i love her!! even though you're starting to become somewhat scared of her and her big stethescope.
you're also starting to "talk" very much. you're quiet the talker, as a matter of fact. i'm already invisioning many, many letters from your teacher expressing her concern for your talkative nature. oh geez, Naima, please be a good girl and don't be that kid in your teacher's career.
you just love to hold long-winded conversations. you literally run our of breath but quickly catch some more to continue your babble. i don't know if you're just telling me of your day or scolding me for leaving you again for a long 8hrs but you sure do sound interesting to me. i know, i know most people would want to make the kid shut-up but i'm your mommy and just love to hear your voice! i just hope you always love to talk to your mommy as much as you do today.
another favorite past-time of yours we've discovered is singing. you LOVE to sing. you sing with us or without us, don't matter, you're going to sing your little heart out! you prefer that we sing with you...especially to your favorite song (amazing grace) that i sing you to sleep with. when i pause, you pause...when i get louder, you get louder...when i get deeper, you get deeper...you're quiet the american idol talent! and when we giggle at your singing antics you get this serious face as if to say hey, don't laugh at the diva...you're in the prescence of a future grammy-award winning talent here!
i love you, Naima. i know you hear this every day, several times a day but it's true and i just can't stop saying it. I LOVE YOU, MY SWEET BABY! and the past 4mo have been a joy that has been incredible and unbelievable. THANK YOU!
love, mommy
